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‘Mr. and Mrs. Suspicious’ racked up action-packed 2017

Natalie St. John

Published on January 2, 2018 4:21PM

Each year, Pacific County dispatchers receive hundreds of calls about “suspicious” people, vehicles and activities. Many of the callers’ concerns are justified, or at least well-intentioned. But “suspicious” is a very subjective term. It’s not unusual for these calls to reveal as much about the callers’ perceptions as they do about the “suspicious” situation.

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January: Mr. Suspicious walked in the middle of the road on his way to Ocean Park. With icicles in his beard, he knocked on doors and asked for cigarettes. Mrs. Suspicious fell down several times during a quarrel in Seaview. Still chilly, Mr. S ran the hand-dryer in a restroom to “keep the place warm.” He also flew drones and spied on people in Ilwaco, loitered in Long Beach, and threw things at a car in Smith Creek.

February: The Suspicious couple moved things around and turned up the heat in a Naselle home. They also did “obnoxious stuff,” like rattling chains, pounding on doors, and locking doors that weren’t supposed to be locked. Mr. S had a razor, tools and flashlight with him when he jumped a fence in Long Beach. The couple then went north to spread garbage around.

March: The couple hung out in the middle of the road and caused an incident with a small dog. Mrs. S seemed “spacey” while hitchhiking in Grayland, and Mr. S “staggered around” in Seaview. He was wearing red and black checkered pants when he went to Ocean Park, where he spent a week frightening customers by wearing a knife, “ranting and raving,” and wearing a “Jesus saves!” sign while playing the radio and dancing in the street.

April: Mr. S screamed and yelled in “a big jacket” and played loud music. He got his rig stuck on some rocks, and revved the engine, then went to Grayland to throw rocks at a home. Back in Ilwaco, he triggered a SWAT response when he carried a rifle-shaped package into a school building while dressed in a brown uniform and cap. He also caused alarm when he had a cabbie drop him off near the airport. Mrs. S lied down on the ground in Long Beach next to a small dog. Not to be outdone, Mr. S rested on the floor of a business, telling onlookers he “just needed to lay down.”

He drove “low-rider” while casing homes in Surfside, then looked “creepy” while driving a van.

May: Mr. S dug through a garbage can and drove a “creeper van,” while his wife screamed outside of a Long Beach home in a brown wig. After pacing in front of apartments and running through Long Beach with a rifle, Mr. S parked a motorhome near the sewage plant. In South Bend, the couple refused to leave the emergency room. After attempting to steal a go-cart, the couple partied with 20 “hardcore bikers” in OP. Mr. S then tried to provoke a fight “with anyone and everyone” in Raymond.

June: It was a quiet month for the Suspiciouses, but they did dress in camo gear while trying to “steal stuff” in Ilwaco. In South Bend, Mr. S walked around a park with a knife in his hand.

July: Mr. S refused to stop drinking beer on someone’s porch, and slept beneath a pile of clothes by a stop sign. Then he upgraded to a bench and a sleeping bag. On July 5, he greeted the dawn by screaming obscenities on the Discovery Trail. In OP, he asked people if he could “use the radio,” then tried to dig up a hydrant with his hands while wearing a stolen American flag around his shoulders. One day, he walked around in a dog mask, which gave a South Bend 911-caller “the creeps.” While drunk, he suddenly appeared in a garage door in Naselle, startling the homeowner. Meanwhile, Mrs. S spent a productive afternoon yelling at cars before sleeping in a garbage-filled VW van in Chinook. Mr. S looked “unique” as he rode his bike in Surfside. He and a man-bun-wearing pal spent some time “messing with stuff” in Seaview. He wrapped up a busy month by smacking on an RV window.

August: It was a rough month for the Suspiciouses. First, they left a “suspicious suitcase covered with leaves” in Ilwaco. Then they were seen “screaming and yelling at each other” during a motorcycle ride on Sandridge Road. Mr. S screamed at the top of his lungs as he ran around a Seaview campground, then drove a red SUV around a neighborhood in a suspicious manner. A Seaview resident reported Mrs. for visiting an empty house, purportedly to “water plants.” A Raymond resident reported the shirtless Mr. S for getting in and out of a car, and in Ilwaco, someone called 911 because he was “jumping up and down” without any shoes on. Mrs. S was still hale and hearty, despite their difficulties. On Aug. 30, a Grayland caller estimated she was 6’8” and weighed 265 pounds.

September: The Suspiciouses drove a jam-packed Prius with California plates and “terrorist stickers all over it.” In Bay Center, a resident thought Mr. S might be up to some kind of “sex stuff.” He was seen “acting erratically and scary” in Nahcotta, but in Ocean Park, he seemed more like a “shady character” who was probably hunting for magic mushrooms. He wore dark clothing while looking through a bag in Seaview, camo pants for a walk in Long Beach and no shirt at all when he “attacked” a truck in Ocean Park. The spirited Mrs. S threatened to burn down a Grayland home, then went to Ilwaco for a bit of “screaming at the top of her lungs” at the sky. She ended the month by sleeping in the road. The caller said she was snoring.

October: Mr. S claimed to have run out of gas. In Raymond, Mrs. S sported long, dark hair while “running between a house and car over and over again.” At mid-month, Mr. S used a wheelchair, which he kicked over. He reportedly righted it, got back in, went down the street and then fell over. The next day, the couple unplugged an electric car that was charging, then sat on the hood and took pictures of the owner. Mr. S parked in a private driveway in Tokeland and talked about aliens. In late October, he drove around a building for 10 minutes, sat in front of some mailboxes, surprised some Smith Creek residents with a 4 a.m. visit, and repeatedly called a woman regarding the lottery. Mrs. S went mushroom-hunting after dark. The couple tried to panhandle in Seaview on Halloween, but a 911-caller said Mrs. S appeared to be 10 or 11 years old. Mr. S. claimed she was 23.

November: Mrs. S slept in her car, while Mr. S acted “very strangely” and had a scabby face. He also shined a laser in Long Beach and changed his clothes in someone’s backyard. Mr. S’s decision to wear a “heavy flannel with hoodie and camo pants” was apparently not a good one, because someone reported him for “giving off a bad vibe.” Mrs. S wore a pink hoodie while weaving in and out of traffic and yelling. In Chinook, her hubby was seen “tearing his tailgate off and throwing pieces of his truck onto the road.” Mr. S was reportedly “all jacked up” as he paced back and forth in front of a home, and Mrs. S went mushroom-hunting again. With Christmas coming, the couple went door-to-door in Naselle, in an attempt to sell cleaning products.

December: Mr. S engaged in one of his favorite pastimes — shining lights into windows. He and Mrs. S tried to “hang out” on a porch, but had to scoot when the owner came home. On a walk through Seaview, Mr. S pulled stitches out of his face. Soon after, he went door-to-door again, this time with a bottle of liquid Tide and an upside-down name tag. The couple had a screaming fight in a Chinook parking lot, and exchanged money in an Ilwaco parking lot. Mr. S ran around with a hose and gas can, while Mrs. S threw a fit in a bar. While passing through Bay Center, Mr. S drove up and down a road, and claimed to be looking for someone. In Ocean Park, he rode a “homemade moped” with no lights at a high rate of speed.


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