Mr. and Mrs. Suspicious rack up a hectic year of misadventures

PACIFIC COUNTY — In airports, posters and announcements often tell travelers, “If you see something, say something.” Some people really take that advice to heart, even when they’re at home, calling 911 to report anything that seems unusual.

During 2016, dispatchers logged hundreds of calls about “suspicious” situations and individuals. Most of these calls involved something that just didn’t seem quite right to the caller, rather than an obvious emergency or crime. Together, the calls indicate that Suspicious Man, Suspicious Woman, and their suspicious friends had a very busy year.

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Suspicious Man (SM) and Suspicious Woman (SW) said goodbye to 2015 by “acting strangely” at a fifth-wheel trailer in Long Beach (LB). On Jan. 3, they were “hanging out,” when SW “passed out” alongside a road. When she came to, they set out for Seaview. The next day, SW dragged two suitcases in Surfside, while SM paced back and forth in Raymond, and claimed to be interested in buying a bike.

Later in the month, they parked their Suspicious Truck in Surfside, and gathered in Ilwaco with suspicious friends. SM was seen “screaming and yelling” and “talking to the wind” in Seaview, talking to deputies while wearing a flannel shirt, camo jacket and black pants, and “screaming” for no reason” in Ilwaco.

February found SM sitting in a sedan with a friend in LB. A week later, they walked around a Tokeland parking lot at 1:39 a.m. Back in LB, they removed screens from the windows of a house. After visiting neighborhoods in Raymond, LB and the Port of Nahcotta in mid-February, SM blocked a client’s car in an Ilwaco parking lot, then took off his shirt, and showed off his many tattoos while walking around LB with a “long sword” in hand.

In March, SM was wearing a brown hoodie when he was nearly hit by a car while walking on the fog-line in Nahcotta. Later in the month, he sported a bandana and sunglasses as he carried a black bag out of an unoccupied home. While wearing a black hoodie, he tried to open doors in LB, and got very loud when he was confronted. In mid-March, the whole suspicious gang was seen “running in and out of trees with guns,” but SM still found time to squat on a LB property, park his Suspicious Vehicle at a public restroom, then drive it up to Nahcotta, where he backed it up to the bay and threw “something” in the water.

By April, the Suspiciouses were staying in an RV in Seaview, where lots of their friends came and went. On April 19, SM was in LB, where he stood on a street corner yelling, with his “fists balled up.” A few days later, he banged on the windows of a car in LB, and asked for a ride.

In May, SM rode a bike around Raymond at midnight, and then went “back and forth” in Nahcotta. He then met up with several friends in Smith Creek, where they used flashlights in an unsuccessful attempt to flag down a ride on the side of the highway.

A day or two later, SM seemed “odd” to a person who found him wrapped in a tarp, lying on the side of the road near Cape Disappointment. Soon after, he reunited with SW in LB, where they took pictures of a young boy, then wandered the streets all day long. SM then yelled on a street in Ilwaco, before sleeping in a vehicle in LB, and acting suspiciously at a business while wearing a rain jacket. Later in the month, he went to South Bend, donned a ski mask, and pulled a knife on a dog. Then, he changed into a beanie, and passed out near a road in Seaview, where a caller noticed the tattoos on his hands.

A few days later, SW sported a buzz-cut, as she behaved suspiciously in OP. Meanwhile, SM and a friend wore cowboys hats as they tried to open the doors to the Tokeland Fire Station. SM wrapped up the month by walking down the road in Menlo, with a tool sticking out of the back pocket of his jeans.

Early June found SW “sleeping and smoking cigarettes” in the doorway of an Ilwaco business, while SM entered a vacant house in LB, and acted strangely with a milk jug at his side in Chinook. A week later, SM wore plaid, as he yelled during a late-night visit to OP. After parking his Suspicious Vehicle in a Raymond alley, SM returned to OP, where he entered a church while wearing a backpack. Soon after, SM and SW reunited on the OP beach approach, then headed down to loiter near a fireworks stand in LB in the early hours of the morning.

In July, SM slept in a car in OP, hid in some bushes with a friend in Nahcotta, then seemed “a little off” during a visit to Ilwaco.

On July 13, SM and a friend cased a home in LB, before loading things into a wheelbarrow in Surfside. A few days later, the Suspiciouses were living in a vehicle in a garbage-strewn area near Bay Center, but they soon took a large white van to LB, where they acted — unsurprisingly — “suspiciously.”

On July 18, SM screamed “for more than five minutes” in OP. Over the following days, he visited Frances, and honked his horn in Naselle. While SM and a friend were visiting an OP property In late July, one of them urinated on the house, and both were seen “fondling” a plum tree. SM slept in a tree in LB, yelled behind a picket fence in Tokeland, and stole a bicycle in Menlo before the month was through.

August found SM visiting the home of a deceased person in Grayland, stalling his vehicle near Surfside, “hanging around” in Seaview, and fighting and firing two shots from a pistol in OP.

In mid-August, SM was acting “creepy” in a green jacket while “marching” down the road and carrying a gun — or possibly a stick. After trespassing in Naselle, he called a Seaview resident to ask for bank account information, then met up with friends to explore an OP clearcut after dark.

SM started September “down on the ground” in Nahcotta. By Sept. 12, he was up again, and “going through stuff” at an OP home. A week later, he cased another home while riding a “mini-bike.” The following day, SW was also on bike, as she screamed “crazy things” in OP.

A few days later, SM apparently no longer had his bike, as he was seen going house to house in Chinook, asking for a ride, looking in the windows of a church, and “acting really weird.” In late September, SM was in Lebam, lying in the gravel. He then returned to OP, where he punched someone in the face.

In early October, SM banged on a door in LB, and was seen with grass and mud “smashed” all over his car. After visiting an OP home and parking his Suspicious Vehicle in LB, he rode his red bike to Seaview, and visited the deck of a vacant home. By late October, he and his friends were once again raising suspicions in a trailer in Seaview, though he was also spotted parking behind a LB business, “pounding on things” in Grayland, and unnecessarily checking a septic system in Nahcotta.

November was a quiet month for the couple, with only a few vague reports of suspicious activity in LB, OP and Surfside. On Dec. 13, however, SM was in a red truck, which he stopped in the middle of a road in LB, forcing other drivers to go around him. Finally, on Dec. 17, he and SW reunited in South Bend, where she was seen, taking “stuff” from a home.

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